Healing Mindset

00:00:06 Speaker 1: Change often arrives without asking permission. Sometimes it's whispers. Sometimes it upends Everything we thought we knew about our lives. And in those moments, we are left with one quiet question how do I keep going when the path ahead no longer looks the way I imagined?

00:00:25 Speaker 1: Welcome to Healing Mindset, where we explore growth, resilience, and the inner shifts that help us heal through the life challenges. I am your host, Nazish, and today I am joined by Laura Bratton, author of Harnessing Courage and founder of UBI global. Laura s life was profoundly changed when she was diagnosed with an eye disease at the age of nine, and later became blind. Her journey through loss, faith, grit and gratitude has shaped how she now supports others in navigating change with strength and meaning. So in this episode, we are talking about navigating through change, especially when that change feels irreversible. Welcome to the show, Laura.

00:01:15 Speaker 2: Thank you. Thank you for the opportunity.

00:01:19 Speaker 1: Wonderful. So, Laura, before we talk about strategies or lessons, I am curious when you look back at the early years of your vision loss, what do you remember most about and how change felt in your body and mind at that age?

00:01:37 Speaker 2: So as a teenager experiencing that incredible major loss, my first feeling was denial. I was I wanted to deny emotionally and spiritually that it was as bad as it really was. So it was denial, like, oh, I'm not going to lose all of my sight. I've just just lost a small amount of vision, even though I, I knew cognitively that wasn't reality. Emotionally and spiritually, that's how I tried to cope. Once that denial wore off and that denial didn't last long, it was the intense grief and the grief manifested in anxiety and panic attacks in deep depression. So it was an incredible emotional and spiritual struggle as I processed the magnitude of the loss of the change.

00:02:42 Speaker 1: Absolutely. And thank you so much for sharing that with us with so much honesty. I know it requires a lot of courage, and it was absolutely beautiful. You know, there's often that this belief that resilience means staying positive or strong all the time. From your experience, what do people misunderstand most about navigating through life changes?

00:03:07 Speaker 2: Just immediately, as as you started that, I just started smiling so much because that's exactly how I defined resiliency at the beginning of experiencing the change. Push through. Be strong. Always be positive. Always be grateful. That's a resilient spirit. That's a resilient mindset. That's a resilient emotional experience that didn't work for me. That definition of resiliency led me to live. And I mean this very literal deeper depression, more panic attacks because I wasn't allowed to express how I truly felt. So now how I define resiliency, what I've learned just through my life experience, resiliency is, is feeling the emotions, all the emotions, the sadness, the fear, the anger, the loss, the grief, the joy, the peace, all the emotions. And then still choosing to move forward, still choosing to make take that next breath. So in a very practical example for me, what being resilient looked like is acknowledging I'm absolutely terrified in this moment. I am, uh I don't know how to move forward. And so I will send this next email, or I will make this phone call, or I will reach out for help even though I don't want to. So resiliency for me is feeling what we feel, acknowledging those feelings, validating those feelings, and then still choosing to move forward the next moment.

00:04:58 Speaker 1: That is very true. And the way you've put it, it is actually bringing forth a lot of, um, you know, framework to this conversation. So tell us, what did resilience Actually look like for you during the years when you were still adjusting to blindness.

00:05:18 Speaker 2: So resiliency looked like moving forward even in the difficult times. So again, resiliency did not look like for me, waiting until everything was peaceful and calm and aligned and then moving forward. It looked like in the midst of deep fear, choosing to take one more breath. It looked like choosing to see a therapist. When I was stubborn and said, I don't need help, I don't need, I don't need a therapist. I can figure all this out. So it looks like receiving help when I wanted to be totally independent and not receive help. So resiliency again looks like Acknowledging and validating those fears, that anxiety, the depression and then still receiving that help, going to that therapist, receiving help from friends and family. So again, it looks like acknowledging the difficulty and still choosing to do the next moment.

00:06:35 Speaker 1: Absolutely. Very beautifully said. And you know, from what I am hearing is that resilience wasn't about denying pain. It was about allowing the grief while still choosing to move forward even when clarity wasn't there.

00:06:51 Speaker 2: Right? That you do both at the same time. And can I can I share a quick story from a mentor that I had that perfectly sums up exactly what you said. Literally. Yes. Yes, please. I need to do as my mentor when I was in college, because that's exactly what she told me. So it was. It was a week before I was starting my freshman year, my first year at college, starting university, and I was in her office and we were talking about scheduling or honestly, I don't even remember what the purpose of the meeting was, but we were talking about something, you know, academic schedule. And then at the end of the meeting, she just stopped me and said, Laura, before you leave, I just want to let you know you can grieve and move forward. And I just kind of looked at her like, what in the world are you talking about? Why are you saying that to me? Right? Because I'm an eighteen year old and I have life all figured out. And she just continued to say, I know you feel like being strong, being resilient is grieving. And then moving forward, I want to give you permission to do both at the same time, that you can continue to grieve and move forward all at the same time. And that is being resilient. So exactly what you just said in this conversation is exactly what that mentor gave me permission to do. So I want everyone listening to also receive that same permission that we today are telling you it's okay, and it's strong to do both.

00:08:34 Speaker 1: That was such a beautiful story that you shared with us and with such a great, you know, outcome to it. It's absolutely beautiful. So when you think of life, like, life changes suddenly, what do you think we are really grieving beneath the surface? Is it the loss itself or something deeper?

00:08:57 Speaker 2: I think it's again, from my experience when I reflect back, it's it's the what deeper and the deeper is the control we knew and we're doing a really good job of controlling how our life was presently. And so when we experience any type of change, when it's sudden, no matter how big or small we categorize it, any type of change, we lose control. We immediately feel uncertain about how to move forward, or how is this change going to affect our day to day life. So I think you're right. I think it's not just the loss itself. It's also the loss of control and the loss. The loss of control means the loss of certainty. We no longer have that certain mindset of this is how my day is going to look. This is how next Thursday, this is how six weeks, six months will be from now, because we have no more control over our outcome, over our life because of that change presented.

00:10:11 Speaker 1: That is absolutely wonderful. You know, tell us one more thing that how did your faith and psychology background help you make sense of those deeper layers of loss?

00:10:26 Speaker 2: It helped me make sense of those deeper layers of loss because and this is going to sound like cliche when I say it, but I mean it. It gave me the understanding I'm human and this is a normal human experience. It's not that I'm weak. It's not that I'm different. It's not that this is some unusual experience happening to me. It's that I'm human. And in our human experience, we will go through change that's unexpected. And so that causes us to have these deeper emotions, these deeper level of experiences. So the gift of psychology reminded me I'm human. And it also reminded me the gift of inner connection interdependence. So what I mean by that is it reminded me and what taught me I'm not reminded me. It taught me that it's okay. And again, part of our human experience to lean on others in times of change, to lean on others when we're in difficulty, to receive help, when we need help, when we need shrink. That's not a weakness. That's just part of our human experience. That all comes and goes at different times throughout our life.

00:11:54 Speaker 1: Yes, I agree. And, you know, it sounds like change doesn't take something away. It also confronts our identity, our expectations, and the story we tell ourselves about who we are supposed to be.

00:12:10 Speaker 2: one hundred percent. I could not I could not agree more. And what it reminds us, going back to what I said earlier of our human identity. Right? Like we get so wrapped up in our life, in our every day and we forget that we're human at our core. It's that we're worthy and that we're enough. And so you're right. Change gives us that opportunity to remember that identity, to return to that identity.

00:12:45 Speaker 1: Definitely. I couldn't agree more. You know, for our listeners going through their own transition right now, how does unresolved grief or fear around change tend to show up in everyday life?

00:13:01 Speaker 2: Uncertainty and panic attack. It shows up. And what I mean by that uncertainty of the future, right? Like I'm uncertain today, in the present moment, I'm uncertain how I'm going to make it from waking up in the morning to the end of the day. So it looks like uncertainty. And it also that uncertainty manifests practically in our bodies and our minds as deep anxiety. We can feel it in that shakiness in our body. We can feel it in that deep pit feeling in our stomach. We can feel it in that nauseous feeling in our stomach, and we can feel it in that deep, extreme panic attack of I feel like I can't get my next breath because I'm so anxious. So I again, in my experience and in working with so many different people, I've seen it manifest in uncertainty, which physically manifest as anxiety.

00:14:05 Speaker 1: Very, very well said. You know, uh, that's it's just so powerful because it shows us that change isn't just a moment. It quietly shapes our daily choices unless we consciously engage with it.

00:14:19 Speaker 2: Right. And it can shape those those choices for the good or for the bad, for our healing, for our peace or for our anxiety and depression. So that's the gift of acknowledging that change and choosing to be resilient rather than jumping into the mindset that I did of denial. Oh, if I just don't think about it, talk about it, process it. It'll somehow go away, right? But yes.

00:14:50 Speaker 1: Definitely.

00:14:51 Speaker 2: Dealing with it and then choosing to believe we are okay even when we do not feel that we're okay.

00:14:59 Speaker 1: I yes, that is very well said. You know, you speak about grit and gratitude. How can someone begin begin to begin cultivating those qualities when they feel overwhelmed by uncertainty?

00:15:16 Speaker 2: The very first place to start with the grit and the gratitude is taking a deep breath and acknowledge I am worthy. I am enough. When we operate from the place of knowing that we're worthy, knowing that we're enough, that then gives us the foundation to have that grit. And the grit looks like resiliency. And the gratitude looks like being grateful in life for what helps us navigate forward. So I want to make it very, very clear gratitude does not look like being positive, happy, thankful all the time in every situation because that's that doesn't validate our true feelings. That that just masks our pain, our reality, our situation, our change. So gratitude is not being positive and happy and thankful all the time for every single thing. Rather gratitude knowledging what helps us navigate forward. So a very practical example for me in my life. It's not saying, oh wow, I am so grateful to be blind. This is wonderful and positive and happy and everyone should try this out. Rather, it's saying I'm grateful to have a guide dog that helps me navigate the world. So it's acknowledging, yes, this loss is hard. Yes, this loss is difficult. Yes, this loss. Loss and change is not what I would want. And in that, I am so grateful for the guide dog that helps me navigate the world. So again, it's acknowledging what helps us navigate through life.

00:17:12 Speaker 1: That is something very well said, and I'm pretty sure that is going to land with a lot of our listeners tonight. You know, what I am hearing is that courage isn't about big leaps. It is about small, intentional steps that rebuild trust with ourselves one hundred percent.

00:17:29 Speaker 2: And it's those little tiny steps and decisions add up to the big to making those big changes that get us to that place of peace, get us to that place of being calm, of being being grounded. So, yes, thank you for saying that, because that has been the thread of this of this whole conversation is the little everyday moments lead up to giving us strength. So it's not I have this big miraculous moment. And then I was peaceful and had no more anxiety and depression. It was the small, tiny moments that we didn't even consider in life that added up to be the big. And then I also want to add to that is those small moments is not the linear moments. So what I mean by that. I thought healing was a straightforward path. Once I started healing, it was the small moments that led up to healing. What I didn't realize and what I had to learn was healing was a process. I took a step forward. I took the steps back. It was not a linear, smooth process that always went forward. It was small moments forward. Then I felt like I was stalling for a while, then going backwards for a while, then going sideways for a while. Every direction. So I also want to make it clear. In my experience, healing is not straightforward. Smooth. It's those small moments that eventually add up to the healing process.

00:19:10 Speaker 1: Yes, I definitely agree. Healing is not a linear. Healing is not linear. There are setbacks that can happen. And you know, just the that the ongoing compassion that, uh, towards yourself is, is what keeps you going.

00:19:28 Speaker 2: Yes, yes. That self-compassion again because you're saying what I said earlier, the that self-compassion is knowing we're worthy, knowing we're enough. So I could not agree more. Again, in my experience and working with so many people, when we have those setbacks, coming back to that identity, you talked about that identity of knowing we're worthy, knowing we're human, that is enough. That's what holds us as we heal. And that itself is a healing mindset.

00:20:06 Speaker 1: Well, that is so well said. Absolutely beautiful, you know. So for someone who is listening right now and who feels like change has taken something precious from them, what is one gentle question would you invite them to ask themselves tonight?

00:20:25 Speaker 2: Remember and ask yourself the identity that you have been able to return to, and that identity in the midst of change is knowing that you're worthy, knowing that you're enough. So yes, the change is uncertain and scary and takes so much from us and is so painful. Yet change gives us the opportunity to remember that self-compassion. Remember that we're worthy. Remember that we're enough.

00:20:59 Speaker 1: That is absolutely beautiful, I must say, you know, navigating change isn't about controlling the outcome. It is about cultivating courage, self trust, and compassion as we learn to live fully in a new reality.

00:21:15 Speaker 2: I could not agree more. I could not agree more. Literally perfectly said. And again, I wish you were my mentor years ago. That is so true. We all need to hear that and internalize that. So yes, thank you for sharing.

00:21:31 Speaker 1: If we do, and this conversation with you has literally bought that reflection and that insight that our listeners needed to hear. It was absolutely beautiful, Laura.

00:21:43 Speaker 2: Thank you. Thank you for creating this platform where we can all take steps towards our healing mindset, because that's what we need. That's what we crave. That's what gives us peace and strength.

00:21:55 Speaker 1: I agree. So, Laura, for our listeners who want to learn more about your work, your book Harnessing Courage or UBI global. Where can they find you?

00:22:07 Speaker 2: The best place is my website Laura Bratten. Com has all the resources on the book. The coaching, the speaking, connecting. It's all right there.

00:22:19 Speaker 1: Wonderful. I will make sure to include all these details into the show notes so that many, many people can connect with you and, you know, you can become and they can become a part of their own healing journey. It is absolutely beautiful.

00:22:33 Speaker 2: Thank you.

00:22:35 Speaker 1: Thank you so much for spending time with us on the healing Mindset. It was an amazing conversation with you and listeners. If today's conversation resonated with you, take a moment to reflect on how change is shaping you. Not just challenging you. Join us again for more conversation that support healing, growth and hope.